What do you think of this poem?
im 13, 8th grade so dont expect anything professional
please give me any critical feedback
Sometimes I wish I could just give up
And let the tears fall
I don’t understand
How their heart can be so small.
They dont know how much it hurts
How my heart ties up in knots
Getting hurt by them
Is like getting never ending shots.
I wish i could stop the pain
But it keeps coming back
Until the day when
I finally give up and crack.
The tears that leek
The wet, sticky cheeks
Puffy, swollen eyes
And hopefully, demise.
18 comments a “What do you think of this poem?”
sad , but good .
= )
wow that was good i really liked it
It’s good…..good for me to poop on.
very uplifting
that was such a great poem even i wouldnt be able 2 think of tht!!! lol =)
it was really good.
it made me think of my own experiences in life.
keep on writing.
It’s really sad… it brings up a lot of questions too. But for your age this is actually really good. If you have anymore you should put them up too.
it was good
i think it could go somewhere
Sorry. But I am younger than you are, and I can write better than that.
But it is still good..kind of..but yeah. If I had to rate it I would most definitely give it a 5
Pray and ask for comfort from God.Study a KJV bible.I listen to a one hour bible study at shepherdschapeldotcom he has been teaching for 50 years and strictly teaches the bible,it will fill up what is missing for you.Just don’t let anything stop you from learning and praying for strength and comfort from God,repent and turn to him and he will help in the form of Jesus.God Bless.
Sad, but good
wow, you’re only in eighth grade?
this is great.
you sure are a wonderful poet
i really like it, and i dont think that there is anything i could criticize you about at all.
keep up the good work!
That’s SUPER good! It’s like a shakepearish poem because it’s something tragic that has meaning. It really connects with people!
its sad but I think its really good
Very good! But why are you feeling so down? ): It makes me sad!
Thats how I feel sometimes especially now.
its okay. sounds emo haha. use some internal rhyme and alliteration.
it sound really good and i’m being honest
good job!
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